So sometimes when I go to my Granny’s I declare a Slumber Party where all grandsons come for food, games, and cartoons. Mostly, SpongeBob. I don’t know how they do it but they always find a SBMarathon. I can only handle about 15 minutes of the nonsense.
But anyway, after playin’ hard and runnin’ off as much of the boy energy as
we possibly can it’s time for bed. The boys “camp” in the living room while all
the adults take to the beds. And those boys stunk!! The scentsy burner couldn’t
keep up with that funk! It’s a mixture of sweat, dirty feet, mud, and farts… so
gross!! I flipped the ceiling fan on to try to dissipate the funky odor and went
As I lay there, I could hear an annoyin’ noise… a constant tickin’. No matter
how loud the TV was or how many pillows I buried my head under, all I could hear
was that tickin’ sound! None of the noises in the house bothered anyone else…
they could close their doors and Granny was snorin’! So I thought that I could
at least turn the TV down, SpongeBob was blarin’!! So I decided to tip toe in
the livin’ room and find the remote to turn the volume down and I would start
with the oldest boy… the oldest always has the remote!
Very quietly, I walk in the room and peek over the couch to where the he lay,
and sure enough he had the remote in his hand!
OH GOOD GOD!! THAT IS NOT THE REMOTE!!!!!!
RUN!! RUN!!!! RUN!!!!! GO TO YOUR HAPPY PLACE!!!! Daffodil
fields and sunshine with a light breeze…. and SpongeBob skippin’ thru it with a
OMG!!! I CAN NEVER UNSEE WHAT I HAD JUST
I quickly went back to the comfort of my bed, and put my head under my
pillows to smother out that sight!!! At 2 in mornin’ I finally figured out what
was makin’ that tickin’ noise but what if he was still awake and still at it??!!
But that noise was drivin’ me insane and It was a Very Short Drive!!!! I put on
my blinders and ran in there and turned off the ceilin’ fan and ran out!!
I made him take a shower the next day!!!
What is it with boys?? My mom and I took 3 of them to the soccer games and
the littlest one kept grabbin’ himself. My mom said she thought he may need to
go pee. So I asked he didn’t to go fish, and he said no, “Then stop, touchin’
your worm!” He would smile up at me with those big doe eyes and grin. He’s 5.
I managed to keep my worst nightmare to myself most of the day but as mom and
I drove home, I told her the whole thing.
“OMG!!!!” she said with wide
I know!! Right??
“OMG!!!! I AM SO GLAD YOU DIDN’T TELL ME
EARLIER!!!! I wouldn’t have been able to look at him all day!!”
“I know!!! I’ve been in agony all day long. I nearly died
when they started talkin’ about whackin’ something!”
When I told HIS MOTHER… she just laughed and laughed… then
said, “I’m glad that was you and not
“I wanted to gouge my eyes out!!!! And You
“What was he watching on TV?”
She laughed even harder!!!
My HappyPlace is ruined! SpongeBob is tarnished!! The image of my grandson
chokin’ his chicken on my granny’s couch is burned in my brain forever.
The other day, I was shoppin’ for pajamas and there was a whole rack of
SpongeBobJammies… RUN!!! RUN!!!
Run to my HappyPlace!!!!
Shoe Shoppin’ at Dilliards… swimmin’ in a room full of
diamonds… Tequila on the beach in Mexico!!!