Friday, March 11, 2011

Facebook, Fat Men, And Roy…

Roy heard on the news that Facebook causes 25% of most divorces.

Are you freakin' kiddin' me???

If an internet website causes your marriage to fail, you have bigger issues than just Facebook and you were destine to fail anyway!!!

I'm on Facebook all the time!!!

And he said, "One of the suggestions to prevent a divorce is to have a joint account."

OH!! NO!! HE DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT!!! FREAK!!!!! MY SHIT!!!!! PLUM OUT!!!!!!!!!!

"But Honey, you don't even like to be online, why in the world would you want to share my Facebook Page with me? Do you feel threatened?"

He told me to delete his email address. He only plays an occasional game of solitaire and is the only time he touches my computer. He really needs to read my blog to see that it's all about him... Okay maybe not readin’ it is better... That would freak his shit plum out!

Seriously, doesn't it just freak you out when a couple has the same account? They've got trust issues.

And he said, "No, I'm not threatened. But maybe I should at least know your passwords."

Oh My Freakin' Green Frogs!!!!

The man can't remember his PIN to his debit card... and he wants my passwords!!!

"Why do you get so defensive?" he says.

"Oh I don't know. Let's see. I have been with you for almost 20 years and you still question me!!!"

A few days later that argument, I had that wicked dream about fat men with small cocks, so I text him to tell him to pencil me in for sex later. That I had that unusual dream, I must be horny and I need to be tended to promptly.

He ran with that... The way his mind works is just an amazement to me. He wants to hear all the details and how he would love to see me havin’ sex with another man.

DUDE!! THAT IS TOTALLY FUCKED UP!!!!

You can’t tell me you want to share my Facebook Account to keep an eye on me and then tell me you want to swing!

Am I right here??

I think we’ve ironed out “our issues” and we do not share a Facebook account.

And he doesn’t know my passwords.

And we don’t swing.

3 comments:

RavNsLove said...

LMFAO! Men!

Back to the trust issues...I love the privacy that the super cool man friend gives me! OMG! I never knew life could be so stress free!

Now, me, eh, I am having issues. But I am working on them. I know they are def my issues. LOL. But I am learning to give him the same as he gives me.

But he does read my blog, I like that he does. I can't imagine that Roy has no idea about all the great things you say about him. But yeah, it prolly is a good idea that he does not.

Katy said...

LORD.

I do think it's odd when couples share an account--I can never figure out who's talking and who I'm talking to.

I've told my husband all my passwords at one point or another, but he's not interested.

Sherrie said...

lol you both make me giggle!