Friday, September 03, 2010

Spam, Wild Parties, And My Manhood…

Huh! My Manhood.

Do you ever look at your spam?

I don’t mean open it. I just read the preview and think, “what the fuck?”…  I do.

And now I’m curious, if you get the same stuff.

Do you?

Have you gotten this one: “Bollywood men cashes in on larger tools?”

My first thought was a bunch of Indian Men went to Sears and got a great deal on Craftsmen tools.

But the preview says, “Get a pecker befitting your manhood.”

What part of my VelvetTush makes you think I’m a man??? There’s nothing… NOTHING wrong with my pecker!!

How about this one: “Wild Party leads to Catfight”?

Well Duh!!!

But the preview says, “Upgrade your manhood when you can, do not wait any longer.”

Becuz I need bigger tools for the all the wild parties and impendin’ catfights???

But my most favorite spam and I’m really hopin’ You didn’t get this one, becuz, it’s sounds like it’s written to me personally.

I honestly don’t know how I feel about this either. I have mixed emotions.

MrHeerkes, are you tryin’ to blackmail me?

He… I’m almost ashamed to tell you.

I’ll just spit it out.

Be Brave, Nadine.

He sent me an email with my wife’s photos attached!!!!

sigh.

First, I didn’t know I was married to a woman.

Secondly, how did he get her photos? He’s probably the sneaky bastard that broke into my house and took my photo!!

Thirdly, I hope she’s cute and we have the same size foot.

Fourthly, I hope Roy will like her.

Fifthly, I hope she and I aren’t on the same cycle becuz that would help me out a Great Deal!!!

Huh?

I better stock up that 80% off Viagra!!

5 comments:

Tracie said...

Oh Nadine! I get those in my junk box at work, some of the subject lines make me blush!!

♥Georgie♥ said...

LMAO...yes I get very similar spam emails

Katy said...

I get all sorts of nutty ones. I read them sometimes just for the giggles.

That post down there about your friend? Beautiful.

The Gaelic Wife said...

Are you sure that somewhere along the way, maybe several years ago, you didn't inadvertantly click the male box rather than the female box on some form?

Billie said...

I love the part where I can get a Russian wife. Do you suppose she might be better than a Peruvian husband?