Roy made me sign up for a weight loss program at the gym. A “Burn it and Earn it” program.
I’d rather sign up the Bench Press Program. I can pump it up at 50 pounds!!
But Roy… he has to lift 150! He’s not so sure he can do that. “why do I have to lift 100 more?? Becuz I have Balls?!!?”
So Burn and Earn… Yes. He Made Me.
I’m not thrilled. I feel pressured to actually lose weight. To stick to a diet… bummer.
If I lose 5 pounds, I get a medal.
But whatever… I have track medals.
“yes, Boys, this is GiGi’s Gold Medal. From High School Conference Track meet. GiGi ran like the wind. And this is GiGi’s weight loss medal becuz she lost 5 pounds. GiGi has a fat ass.”
But WhatEver… Roy made me sign up.
If I lose 10 pounds, I get a free tee shirt. And Roy said, “I think I’ll bulk up. I wanna be sure I get the shirt.”
He plans on gettin’ it next week.
If I lose 15 pounds, I get a trophy. I’d rather have another shirt.
I have a trophy for softball… I don’t know how we got that trophy as we were the worst team ever. We had fun. But we just couldn’t win a game. Apparently, we managed 2nd place though. I used it as a necklace holder… I’m not sure where it is now.
If I lose 25 pounds, I get a plaque. I don’t have one of those. That might be cool. Roy has 2… CopAwards. And one for the Indian, Best American Made Custom Motorcycle… or something like that.
While Roy was still on the treadmill, I got the trainer and told her I needed to sign up.
“We better weigh me in now becuz, I could wake up in the mornin’ a Victoria’s Secret Model and I won’t need the program.”
It could happen.