Saturday, March 13, 2010

RealWives, ExWives, and Bastards...

My, exhub, EarlLee remarried 3 days before I did....which was 7 months after our divorce was finalized. He married a woman from southern Oklahoma, so she had no issues with family and friends and fittin' in, like I did.
Knowin' EarlLee as I do, I had to ask if he knocked her up becuz he was gettin' married so quickly.
"No! Why are you gettin' married so quickly?"
Becuz Roy's the man I have always wanted....that dream husband I wanted when I was 17.
Becuz Roy's a man that I love.
Becuz Roy's a man that I respect.
Becuz Roy's a man that worships the ground I walk on and isn't afraid to show it.
Becuz Roy's a man that is responsible.
Becuz Roy's a man that is stable.
Becuz Roy's a man that doesn't lie to me.
Becuz Roy's a man!
And then I followed up with, "Do I need to speak with your new wife and give her the straight scoop on you?"
"DON'T YOU SAY ONE WORD TO HER!!!"

It doesn't matter, she hates me. And I don't care.
She's one of those women that is super sweet to your face and when your back is turned she's throwin' daggers at you.

With good reason... I'm the ExWife.
You are by default supposed to hate your husband's ExWife.
I know I do.
That Tide Smellin' Bitch!

Over the next 10 years EarlLee and I fought over child support and his lack of payment. He spent time in jail. I received all of his tax refunds. And we still pretty much fought like two cats in a bag...but over the phone... The one that I broke into bazillion pieces by bangin' it on the wall after talkin' to him.
He and I stopped talkin' to each other when the girls were grown and had their own families to deal with...I have no reason whatsoever to say anything to him. I have gone years without givin' him a thought.
And I'm fixin'ta be in his home with him.

I was civil.
You know I'm a grown up now.
Hush! I am!
There were no hugs or handshakes....which I got from his brothers!
I did however fall right back into a zone I had long been gone from and that was that "I will sling orders at EarlLee" zone.
I couldn't help it. It just came out!
It's just how I am... or was with him.
I HAVE TO TELL HIM WHAT TO DO!!
Our daughter was thinkin' about movin' to the country into a very run down shack. I was afraid for her safety and boys'. The house was not something to live in and it needed a lot of work! And I told him a laundry list of things HE WOULD HAVE TO DO for her to live there. It just came out. That bossy side of me just came out.
Suddenly his REAL WIFE needed something, he went off to tote and fetch for her. I realized what I had done. That I may have over stepped some boundaries and she was uncomfortable. He didn't say much to me after that. I think when he was alone with his REAL WIFE, she musta read him the riot act!!
The one time we were alone in the kitchen, he said something to me in a whisper. I barely could make out what he said.
"Speak up Dude! Don't be shy now! I've seen your PeePee!!" is what I wanted to say. But I didn't.

A couple of times when I would scan the room at all the people seein' how badly they all have aged and who is fattest, EarlLee or his Twin brother, I caught him watchin' me....so I know his RealWife was screwed royal that night!!
As we left, there was the standard, "Thanks for coming" said, to which I replied, "I'm so glad you got to see me!"

I managed to get thru it without bloodshed.
So I know I am maturin' ....a bit.

When EdithAnne and I got in the car to go home, I giggled, "Ha ha! I'm still skinnier!"
Talk about Fat Bastard!!!
She cracked up, "oh Mom!"

And we laughed our HappyAss all the home.

3 comments:

Katy said...

That's some story.

I have this ex-boyfriend who I see from time to time and I he's so fakey when I see him. I mean, come on, I know who you are--none of that cheek kissin for me, thankyouverymuch!

Gina (Mannyed) said...

boo - the story ends. Being in an ex's house is not an easy thing to do - I think you did good job of keeping civil.

♥Georgie♥ said...

this sounded so much like my ex husband and our ex life...except i dont get his tax refunds...yet!