Wednesday, May 27, 2009

And Speakin' Of My Inlaws....

So Jen commented....you crack me up, girl. everytime i read your posts - or see the tulsa oil man with the text - take me back to tulsa, i'm too young to marry - i just laugh my head off. i can't believe your inlaws are, well, you know...

She knows the OldFolks!
And a very small handful others....but not like I do!

A long time back...Thanksgiving....my mother inlaw, QueenVictoria, said, "So&So is getting married in May. It's a small family wedding and you're not invited."

Yep, She did!
I Kid You Not!
Isn't she a doll?

Now one would think that I would get my feelin' hurt, but I didn't. I had just lost my grandbaby and I couldn't care less about the things that came out QV's mouth. I just let it roll off of me like water on a duck's back.

She had repeated this same conversation to Roy in a phone call. He couldn't care less either. But to him she went on to say, "And since we'll be in your neck of the woods..."
Like being in Arkansas is our neck of the woods.
"we'll stop in for a visit."

Now that is a horse of a different color!!
"You tell that old lady she's not invited to my house!" I yell at Roy. If she can tell me I'm not invited to a weddin' that she's not plannin' she should be able to relate to her NOT BEING INVITED TO MY HOUSE!!
If I started in January cleanin' my house for a 5 minute visit in May from QueenVickie....It wouldn't be ready!
Roy and I LIVE in OUR house. It's not a showplace for the next cover of Southern Living!
Roy's been after me for about 4 months to find a place to take all the glass booze bottles....he's got 3 55 gallon drums!

And for the record that's 2 years worth of bottles!!!
Or more!

"Tell her she's not invited!"
"I can't tell my mother that!" He said.
"Then tell her we will not be at home!" I would hang out at the mall to avoid her visit.
"I'm not lyin' to my mother!"
"You'd better fix it!!"

It wasn't long after that we recieved an invitation to the weddin'! Problem solved.

When we went to see TheWizard, we stopped by the OldFolks.
And of course, QueenVictoria said, "So&So is gettin' married in May. It's a small family wedding and you're not invited. After the wedding we'll be stopping by your house for a visit."

I just smiled. "Oh there will be no need for that. You'll get to see us at the weddin', we've been invited!"
And I just smiled even bigger.

She sat there lookin' like she just sucked on a lemon!

Problem solved!!!

I think that the old lady does things the way she does to get her way.....she called Roy later....when she thought she'd have his ear only. And went through the whole conversation again!
Roy told her there would no reason to come to our house becuz we would be at the weddin'....that drivin' outta the way was just not a good idea.
His brother was doin' the drivin' so she's at his mercy.
He called to ask Roy about something. I told Roy right then and there, to straighten the whole thing out and be done with it!
"Don't you bring that old lady to my house! She has in her head that she's comin' here, Man, Don't do it!"
I could hear his brother laughin'....he knows and understands full well what QV's like and he will not be bringin' her for a visit after the weddin'!!


We shall see how this all plays out....the weddin' is this Saturday in Eureka Springs!

Jen, Roy and I just walk to the beat of different drummer. And if the old lady knew....she'd flip her wig!

4 comments:

Miss Thystle said...

you should tell her you moved. But then, don't tell her where. Also? CALLER ID. Stop answering.

MizAngie said...

Yep, sometimes being an old maid ain't all that bad...NO INLAWS!

Susan said...

this makes me glad that i don't live closer to my extended family!

Anonymous said...

Hey love.....sorry about not posting your comments but I'm paranoid that I'm being watched.

Just wanted you to know I'm still around and i'm still reading.