And I felt that right until I pull into my grandmother's driveway.
I covered up good....at least I hope so.
When I left my house, it was snowing.
A fine snow....a little bit..... that by the time I made it 3 miles, it was gone....but that drive was still there...the drive for an hour and a half was still there.
It was cold but I was so hot....sweatin'!
I had been dreadin' this.
Was it gonna be an all out cry-fest or a knock down drag out over who took the food home at the end of the day?
I hate my cousin....another story for another day.
Roy doesn't go with me.
He gets stuck with Grandpa.
And hates it.
Grandpa's a pill with a bad memory of what stories he's told.
He's told them over and over and over....
Roy's heard them all.
So I go alone.
You know, I have seriously given thought to askin' Jean to come with me.
Sorta backup....some one to ride shotgun.
A reason to leave when the pressure was too great to bare any longer.
And then thought against it becuz I'd rather keep them as friends...ones to call on when I REALLY NEEDED THEM.
In my car, it's 1985.
The Oldies Station on the radio....it seems natural for a Camaro to be playin' Heart and Stevie Nicks.
It's 37 degrees and I'm sweatin' like it's 224!!
I really dread this.
It's the only time I think I have ever driven the speed limit....the whole way.
Once I was there....I learned that my daughter had fallen and broken her ankle....she might not come.
I really just wanted to leave.
She's the only reason I went.
Well... maybe for my grandmother too.
She cries all the time now.
I can't bear that.
I'd take a bullet for her....and she cries all the time.
I pulled my shit together.
And tried to make the best of it.
My mother is there....and I have mother issues.
And made the best of it.
A surprise to everyone when EdithAnne does hobble in....needing a screw in her ankle...but it's a holiday....it'll wait.
She and her husband gave my niece her baby's RubySlippers.
My Niece cried.
EdithAnne asked me if I wanted the hat and scarf I had crocheted for the baby back.
I held my tears back and said yes.
I'm glad I sent the top to Angie....at least I know where it went.
The hat comes back to me....I know where it went.
It was rough....really rough.....but I put on a brave face.
I know how to fake it.
I have to.
Pick up the pieces and go home.....