Wednesday, June 25, 2008

New Quiz...

Our beloved Ventl8r's idea: "I have compiled a quiz from the book entitled "The Little Book of Stupid Questions" by David Borgenicht. This quiz will contain some very insightful questions geared at revealing your inner self. Have fun!! And as the theme these days is getting to know one another, here's my version." -Kristi

So I'm a team player
....And for fun I'll add Roy too.

1. If you ate your foot would you lose weight?
No, They are a size of hot dog....with less fat!
Yes, those are big suckers...not fat just large!!

2. Is it weirder for you to make love in your parents' bedroom or for them to make love in yours?
Been there and done that....horny-ness overcomes any ounce of icky-ness.
He rolls his eyes. That would be a no! Just too weird. Come to think about it ....do they have sex in it??

3. What vegetable to you most resemble?
A turnip...tiny at the tip and large in the middle with lot of top above the ground.
A green bean....lean and long.

4. What would the name of your band be?
DrunkMidgetSex would open for GrumpyOldDudes!
5. Do you consider yourself to be more of a head-butter or a groin-kicker?
Groin, always! one shot....one kill!
Both, it's dog eat dog world...Do what you have to do....Kill'em all and let God sort it out!!

6. If you had a theme song what would you pick?

6a. What if the song were played every time you entered a room or walked down the street would you change your mind?
No Freakin' Way! I want it played as they roll my casket outta the church!
It should always be played...If it's heard on the PoliceRadio now...it's not Roy.....any more!

7. If you could have one superpower what would it be and how would you use it?
The ability to fly....to be a FreeByrd!!
If??? What?? I don't have superpowers??

8. Which of the Brady sisters would have been most likely to have gotten pregnant as a teen? Marsha.....whatta ho!!
Agreed Marsha....whatta babe!!

9. Do animals think we're magical gods or just plain nuts?
Nuckin' futs! I agree with Kristie....my bed is full of sleepin' cats.....That's not magical!
He rolls his eyes...that would a no!! Get off my bed!!

10. Who would drive you crazy faster - Barney, Urkel, Mr. Rogers, or The Nanny?
Mr Rogers....he seemed a bit creepy.
And was he gay?

11. Who's smarter, dogs who chase their tails and drink out of a toilet - or cats, who lick themselves until they cough up a furball and chase shadows?
Cats...They are on my bed and the dogs are in the backyard....in the sun!
Cats and go get them off my bed Before they throw up on my side!!

12. Do you think the first time corn ever popped it scared the hell out of the Native Americans? My people call it Maise...and it scared me the first time!!
He rolls his eyes...your people?

13. What sort of margin of error do you work with when it comes to the expiration date of food? I'm a total slave to the date. Have you have had food poison???
Throw it out the day before!! I've had food poison!!!

14. What dead person would you least want to be haunted by (remember: how they died would affect how they look as a ghost)?
I don't want to be haunted by anyone....but if I gotta...HeathLedger...he was nekked!! Norma Jean....she was nekked!!

15. Which celebrity's butt would you most like to squeeze?
Brad Pitt
Angelina

15a. Which celebrity would you most like to have squeeze your butt?
Duh...Brad Pitt!
Duh...Angelina....do you think they would do some swappin'? She rolls her eyes!

16. What mail order catalog would you be most likely to model for?
Victoria Secret's Phat Girl line...it doesn't exist and it should!!
Now..National Rifle Association....He was a poster boy once for a CopLand Organization...It's on the Roy Hightower Wall of Fame.

17. If you could have an extra appendage what would it be and where would you put it?
Well I've always wanted a penis....to see what the big deal was all about!
A boob to fondle when you're sick. She rolls her eyes! Men!

18. What would your name be if you were a goodfella?
Slick...nuff said!
Mr Hightower...duh!!

19. Which cartoon ability would you rather have - the ability to paint a hole on a solid object and go through it - the ability to be run over by a steamroller and "shake it off" - or the ability to fall hundreds of feel off a cliff to your certain doom and be back in the very next scene?

The ability to fall and bounce back from it.... The best metaphor for our life.

3 comments:

Billie said...

As always... you make me laugh.

VENTL8R said...

BWA!!! Those are great!

Mannyed said...

That has to be the best quiz answers I have ever read on anyone's blog. You + Roy = hilarious!