Thursday, August 02, 2007

How I Spent My Summer Vacation....2005

I wrote this a long time ago...... an email to all my RealWorld friends and family....right after it happened.
So you will see that I have ALWAYS been THIS way......And now I blog........

A bit of Aunt called me up and said "Come with me to take Granny and Grandpa to California."
I stupidly said yes!!!

I was very worried that this trip with the grandparents would be a mistake!!! I may never speak to my grandpa again!!!!!
By day 2 when we hit Escondido, California, I told my aunt to take me to the nearest airport and put me on a plane back to Tulsa!!!

She wouldn't do it!!
After having a knock down drag out with Grandpa in Tucson traffic that was all I wanted!!!!
I was doing fine but he didn't think so!! A man that can't turn his head to see the road behind him is telling me how to drive!!!!
My aunt and I had plans to stop and see things along the way but NO!
We were driven thru this trip like Sherman's March to the Sea!!!!
WE drove for first 2 days..............12 hours each day!!!!
He said we need to stop becuz Granny couldn't go any further...........she was sleeping most of the time!!
Be a man and own up to the fact that you are tired and need to stop!!!!!
Day 5, I was crying on the phone to Roy to come and get me!!!

I was somewhere in the middle of Oregon by this time. Grandpa had said that my presence was making him sick after an argument that he started.
Roy said it would take him 4 days to find me, to just gut it out and he would take me later to do it right. He is a good man!!!
We did manage to drag Grandpa thru the Sequoia National Forest. "Well, we have tree in Oklahoma!"

Good God!!!
We were whipped thru there too......"I don't want to be in here after dark."
I could not stop to take pix becuz the car might overheat!!!!!!
I was almost in tears at thinking I could not get out and see the largest trees in America........I wanted out and to go home!!!
WE drove 250 miles out of the way to Coure Delane, Idaho so he could look up "relatives". There is a town called Harrison just 20 miles away.............It says clearly on the map HARRISON.........but when we got there.........He realized it wasn't HARLESON...........I told My Aunt we should drag his ass down there anyway!!!!

WE could have been almost to Mount Rushmore by this point.......but NO!!!! I was so pissed off!!!
I didn't take my cell phone becuz RubyJune said I could use hers, it has nationwide and loaded with minutes.........but becuz she left it at his house, it was HIS!!!!

Luckily, Aunty had her's so I could make my daily call to Roy.
About 5 days into this trip from Hell, Grandpa realized neither he or Granny could hear it ring from all the missed calls......I got to carry it!!!
I couldn't use it mind you. I had to sneak off to call my husband!!!!!!!!
I was whispering to RubyJune in a bathroom in Montana to keep her updated on the progress of the torture!!!
When we made it to Iowa and I knew when we were going to be home soon, RubyJune had the nerve to say..."Can you keep him out longer? I have something I need to have installed at his house and I don't want to do it when he is there."
Has she not been listening to me all this time???????
By the time we got across Idaho, Montana and into Wyoming we stopped at Sheridan for the night. There was a tizzy over the trip to Mount Rushmore. I stayed out of it and let him and Aunty go at it.

I didn't care, all I wanted was to go home!!
She and I had already decided what road to take but after the tizzy it was decided to go Rapid City and go down and come right back up to Rapid City so he would shut up!! There was the sweetest little old lady working at the visitor center just after we crossed the border into South Dakota.....I would like to go back and kiss her on the forehead .....she took out her pen and drew on the map the EXACT SAME ROAD that my aunt and I had planned to take........and he said " that sounds like a good Idea!"
After we got to Mt Rushmore, He announced we had 30 minutes to see what we came to see and get back on the road.....30 MINUTES!!!!
Oh well that is just about the amount of time I spent at the beach at Oceanside!!!!
Now how many sailors can a gal pick up in 30 minutes?????
Well, I could have picked up a cop in less than 10 minutes!! I'm a hot babe!!
Granny said after we left Oregon that she will never take another trip with him again.

I took over 200 pix out the windows of the van becuz he would not let us stop!!!
As I was showing Roy the pix titled "My summer vacation at 65 miles per hour", he just ain't funny!!!
My Aunt and I made the most of it and it would have been super without him. WE gambled and played the scratcher cards along the way even Granny did and we laughed at him behind his back.

I teased Granny all the way and kept her from being in tears over the whole thing....I would rather die than to cause her any grief!! I bought her a "beer", she wouldn't touch it....It was a cream soda!!! I teased her becuz she was gambling....she won $9 on one ticket!!
One day we are getting gas and she said, "Sister, those men are looking at you."
"Yep, Granny, I am a hot babe!"
And then for no reason on earth, a biker helped her out of the van. He was just so sweet. Just as soon as we got in the bathroom door closed, " Why did he do that?"
"Granny, you are just a hot Babe!!"
And Thank God for my Aunt's little "Happy Pills"!!!!

Never travel with an old man and if you grow up to be an old cranky man...........stay at home and let the kids have fun!!!!

Last April she called me up and said, "Come with me to take Granny and Grandpa to California."

"Not just no but Hell no!!!"


Beth said...

My summer vacation at 65 miles per hour that is great LOL i would have laughted too! actually i did !! THis was a great blog.....and i enjoyed the trip !

Proto said...

Hell no indeed. Don't need a niece telling me how to drive either. Just give me choices, and I'll pick one.

mannyed said...

I would've cried too if I wasn't allowed out of the car to see things and take pictures. But as usual, you made the best out of an unpleasant situation.

Dawn said...

damn....I would've ripped my hair're a better woman then I for making it....

oh and as for your comment on my blog...nope not scabbies either...but they still can't tell me what it is...they say maybe some sort of seeds from all of the trees around us or some sort of bug shit...well they didn't say shit..but you get my drift....

Anonymous said...

OMG What a trip lol. I can see why you said HELL NO!


MizAngie said...

Why do so many old men get sooo cranky? My Daddy did that, too, but it wasn't constant. Not as bad as your grandpa. Wow. I'm such a heifer, though, that I would tell my Daddy that I was gonna do such and such and he could sit and stew in his own juices while I did it. Only when I really, really wanted or needed to do something, though, because I hated upsetting my Daddy.

Kendra said...

Well, at least you LEARN from your mistakes. Every year my stupid redheaded self says "oh! Family Vacation? GREAT IDEA."

But then, I do always remember to fill my Prozac prescription before I leave....

M said...

You should have strapped Grandpa in a rocker and tied him to the roof of the van - now that would have been fun!!! Poor you!

Beth said...

hope you have a great weekend