Wednesday, August 08, 2007

The Balance of the Hightower Universe

There are Republicans and Democrats.
There are Cats and Dogs.
There are The Cowboys and the rest of the NFL.

And there is SuperMoodyBitch and SurlyBastard!

They are not equal in any way shape or form.

That SurlyBastard can't hear very well.
But manages to really piss off SuperMoodyBitch and he can hear every word she screams!!

That SurlyBastard can't remember Shit!

And in a fair fight, SHE WILL WIN!!
ALL That SurlyBastard had to do was eat the ziti!

I worked on it for 2 days!!! BUT NO!!!

SuperMoodyBitch threw it to the dogs!!!

Just put your manhood on the ground and walk away!

SuperMoodyBitch is pretty predictable in when she is comin' to visit and she doesn't stay long....though it is uncomfortable for Roy the ENTIRE TIME!
Normally Roy is...wellll.....what's the best word.......cranky....hard to get along with....a smartass in general. He is good to those that have taken the time to get to know him...those that tolerate the crankiness...know it's bluff....a way of cullin' out the hangers on.
He is infamously famous...a legend in his own mind! The stories I know but can't tell....someday maybe.
But That SurlyBastard comes and goes at will....I never know when he's gonna bite my head off!
Over the smallest things!!

Back in February I reserved my copy of Harry Potter from Amazon. And I told Roy about it.

"How did you do that?"

"With my Credit Card."

That SurlyBastard said, "Is that wise?"

"It's okay. I have bought with them in the past."

Two weeks before the book came:

"I bought a book from Amazon." I have to remind's only fair.


"February, the last Harry Potter book."

"How did you pay for it."

Calmly, "with the credit card."

That SurlyBastard said, "Are you sure that's wise."

"Yes! I have order from them in the past."

The day the book came:

"Yes!!! I'm so happy I have my book!"

"How did you pay for that?"

"With my credit card."

That SurlyBastard said, "We have had that talk! You are not to use the credit card online."

Deep breath and hold hands so as not to slap him...."I told you I bought it online from Amazon and it will be okay."

I'm used to that SurlyBastard and I handle him quite well. I do have my limit though.

One week after the book arrived, he calls me at work while is payin' the bills:

"What did you buy from Amazon?"

He is really pushin' the limit.

"I bought my Harry Potter Book from them."

That SurlyBastard said, "That book you read in 2 days? I don't think it's worth it!"

O Lord Please Help Me Keep SuperMoodyBitch From Killin' Him!

"Honey, don't get me started on the all the huntin' gear that still have the tags on them."


mannyed said...

i feel like i have the same type of conversations with my hubby. he never remembers anything i tell him, and he will always ask me the same questions over and over.

Beth said...

Offer to let him read the book, to get his moneys worth LOL

Sherrie said...

I so feel your pain LOL! And of course they don't believe us when we gently tell them we've had this discussion before.

I would tell you how the competition went, but I think I may just try to blog about it in the next couple of days! Imagine that.....ME BLOG!


MizAngie said...

I have conversations like that - with myself! It's crazy!!!

ventl8r said...

You're right, there's the Cowgirls and everyone else who plays against them. I'm on the bandwagon for everyone else who plays against them!

And what's up with Michael Irvin, getting into the NFL HOF??!?! With his past drug/police record? What kind of role model is that??

Sorry, don't like ANY Texas team, regardless of sport or division. It's all in where you are raised. Round here, it's all NU.


Beth said...

morning to you , hope your day started out well and the heat is killin ya. Its aweful here and you cant breath, just sux really. well its back to wrk will checkin later

Beth said...

OMG Big Brother is so different this year isnt it.....the first few weeks ED was in control of most of the house except Jen of course and i cant believe the two of them are joining forces unles she is using him and not saying anything i know he is using her Jessica gets on my nerves with her squeeky voice....i think when Dustin was refering to his girlfriend he meant his guy partner LOL that is the way i took it !!! or maybe the door does swing both ways for him nasty if you ask me..... I dont think Jen is in the house because they want her there she is lucky with the POV and also Jamika helped her out of pure honesty by standing by her word not sure she really wanted to do it I dont know who will win but right now i am pulling for jameka just cause she is kinda the odd man out and really needs it.