I am going to have to drag out the ladder to fix the vents at work becuz the starlings will come back to roost.
Nobody else will.......so here is the tale that sparks that comment.
A couple of springs ago........ I noticed the birds in the attic. I could hear them and I saw one thru one of the light fixtures. Roy sometimes comes to work with me. So I told him to help me catch it. He was reading the paper and blew me off.
That was Saturday.
Monday morning when I opened the door of the clinic, I was greeted by a bird in the face.
Have you seen Hitchcock's The Birds???
All I could do was cover my eyes!!!
Don't peck at my eyes!!!!
I felt like Tippie Hedren!!
That damn bird flew back and forth banging into the window and then into the wall.
It was awful!
Everytime it hit the wall, it pooped.
Every time it hit the window, it pooped.
As it flew over me, it pooped!
Does it have an endless supply of poop???
I finally got it caught and started cleaning up the mess when another one started flying around.
Here we go again.
I got that one caught and out the door.
And again I started to clean the mess.
Now I understand how come there is so much poop......EVERYWHERE.......then from behind the dog food display hops a third bird!!!
It just hopped to me.....and I open the door so it could hop on out.
It hopped over to the hedges and fell over. I went back later to check on it and it must have died, it never moved.
So as you can imagine I am so pissed off!
When I got home, Roy was on the couch watching the news. I said to him, "Do you want your ass kickin' now or later?"
He looked at me with a slight grin, "Now."
And I proceeded to tell him my version of The Birds. All he had to do was help me get that damn bird on Saturday and he would not have been in hot water on Monday.
Next morning, he informs me that he has done battle with a red wasp but he could not find the body....To watch out for them as it is warm enough for them to come out.
And off to work he went.
I got out of the shower and was drying off when I noticed Monster watching the floor intently......he is a bug freak! And just about the same time I felt this tickle at my foot. I look down and it was the wounded red wasp!!
After a dance and a jig, I determinded that he was no real threat. I picked it up and put him in the toilet to show Roy that I had recovered the body.
And Roy has really slipped as far as being my protector. I mean really!!! First birds and now wasps!!!
When I got home, Roy says to me, "Do you want your ass kickin' now or later?"
I put on my best Clint Eastwood glare, "I'll take mine now."
And he proceeded to tell me how he found out about the red wasp.
Let's just say that sometimes when a man has to go, a man has to go. And when there is a live red wasp floating in the toilet ready to attack all the little dangley bits.....someone is going to get an ass kickin'!!
Don't you just love Spring!!
Now get out there and throw back to convertables and take out those t-tops and let's go topless!!!