I Must Confess....
I am not a baker. Sad but True.
I can cook! I could hang with Martha any day.....well in a Justin Wilson sorta way...Remember the Cajun cook that would tell stories while mixing up a roux.....and would add a cup of wine and then spill over a lot more......I am sorta that kind of cook!
I don't measure a lot of things that I have made over and over and over.....like home made biscuits and chicken picatta ......So yummy!!!
But back to baking.........I can not bake.
I wish I could blame the oven.
Or the fact that I have to put all powder items in large jars to keep out the bugs.
But it is just me!
I have burned many cookies....so I don't bake them any more.
I gave up on brownies YYEEEEAAARSS ago....so not worth it....just buy the damn things!
I haven't made pumpkin bread since in 6 years becuz of that very bad incident....I mixed it all up and it was looked so pretty in the pans and I put it in the oven and walked away....the buzzer goes off and open the oven up to see that nothing has changed.
What the Hell???
It was still soupy!!!
I had oven right.
I checked the recipe. I had that right...all the stuff was still on the cabinet.
I reset the timer and walked away....only this time I set it for 10 minutes.
The Buzzer goes off.....and still soup....VERY SWEET SOUP!!!!
I had mistakenly used powdered sugar for flour and so it wouldn't rise and make bread....just soup!
It wasn't long after that....like the next Thanksgiving or something.....I decided to make pecan pies.
I love pecan pies...who doesn't??
I had two the most beautiful pecan pies made....I set them on the stove and finished baking a smoked turkey....we always take smoked turkey as the turkey at Roy's parents may have come from a dumpster.....That is just gross....and every one else must feel the same way becuz we very rarely take the smoked turkey back home...anyways....
The buzzer goes off and I go into check on the turkey and find two burnt pecan pies!!!!!! The heat from the oven circulates up and over the top of the stove and burned them!!!!!
I sat down and cried!!
They ate them though....which goes to prove that every one loves pecan pie!!
So True to form....the following year, I baked another pecan pie.
I preheated the oven and mixed it up and set in the oven as instructed by the recipe...this is one I follow to the letter.
And started on the smoked turkey.....and hour later...I have pecan soup in a pie shell....What the hell!!!???
I let it bake 15 minutes more....and the top is browning nicely....but the bottom is still soupy....What the Hell is going on????
I continue to monitor it every 10 minutes....I took the turkey out and move the pie up...I am going into my 2 hour on this pie...and I still have soup!!!!
Sometimes things just hit me like a ton of bricks.......I have the broiler on!!!!!!!
Not the bottom heat but the top heat baking my pie!!
I broiled my pecan pie!!!
I broil everything.....even pies!!!!
I took it out and thought maybe it would set up....the juice I shoveled off the oven door did???
When I got to OKC and unwrapped my pie....with Roy over my shoulder laughing at me and my pie....juice was leaking everywhere....I was near tears!!
But you know what...they ate half of that pie!!!!
That just proves that EVERYBODY LOVES PECAN PIE....and PECAN SOUP!!! It would have made great topping for ice cream!!!
And the really sad thing....I am the only one that dares to bake one!!
Roy said later in the car on the way home....."It is a good thing you can cook becuz that baking thing would be a deal breaker!"
What a guy!