Sunday, February 05, 2006

Debate: Real or Fake...

Subjects for discussion on Date Night was pretty weighty. After being riled up at work, I was not the best company.
Things got pretty preachy at work. I don't mind Christians. They have their place in society. I know some pretty nice ones but they keep their views to themselves and do not try to convert me. I am a spiritual person. I believe in a higher power but not religious by any means.......it doesn't make sense to me either but that's my story and I am sticking to it!!
After the sermon, I felt dirty. And that ANYTHING that was REMOTELY PLEASURABLE would lead me to Hell. Like I should wear a burlap bag, shower thongs and drink water and eat dirt!!
Roy said, "Blow it off and have another Margarita!" So I did!
On to the Debate:
Apparently at work with the boys, Roy has been discussing what to get the gals for Valentines Day. They look to Roy as he older and wiser and should by now know what to give the wives and girlfriends for the big day to keep them out of the dog house and off having wild passionate sex. One would think that he would know that but......
"The guys and I were talking about jewelry."
Of course that sends bolts of lightening down my spine. The heavens open up and the cupids start to fly, they are strumming Claire DeLune on the little harp thingies. And I don't say a word. I want to hear more.
"I thought that I would look into buying one of those rings.........(The cupids were playing a little louder.) with the 3 stones.......( 1 carat princess cut diamonds were going thru my brain....The cupids were all a twitter!!).......you know the one with the heart shaped rubies."
What???
Back the Truck up!!
You could hear the tires chirpin' and smell the brakes burnin'!!!
The cupids stopped playing.
One said the other, "He said Hearted shaped Rubies!!"
The other one replied "Oooooooh, this should be gooood!!"
"Heart shaped rubies??!
If they are heart shaped, they are lab created!!
His face went pale.
At Christmas time when he went shopping for a ring for me, he picked out the prettiest little Ruby ring. The salesgirl neglected to tell him about lab created stones. I was the one that broke the news to him. Fortunately, he had not purchased it.
And let me add a valuable piece of advice here: NEVER SIZE RINGS WHEN YOU ARE SUFFERING FROM PMS!!
"But they are soooo much prettier and they sparkle so much better that the real ones."
"Oh! Really!! I will try that on you some day. That the fake or generic is better." He hates generic things.
"With what?"
I grabbed two handfuls of boobs and shook them at him. "Real ones! You know you don't like fake ones!"
Some times, I forget that there are OTHER PEOPLE IN THE WORLD and will just do things may cause some folks some embarrassment.
Stammering for the right words. He came back with, "Name another!"
"Dr Pepper!! I will start buying you the cheap Walmart brand."
The cupids said, "Holy O'Shit, not the Dr Pepper!!"
It is bad enough he has to drink Mr Pibb in some restaurants becuz they don't serve Dr Pepper. We have gone so far as to get up and leave becuz the pop machine was broken and he couldn't get either to drink!!!!
He had no comeback for that. He just sat there with silly smile on his face......Geez Louise!! Older and wiser????
So what do you think?? Real or Fake??

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